Previously- Saggy Tit Carwash Later- Bitch, Ya Got Pruned! Now-
Live at Yokai City's #1 Bath House, it's...
Hell TV Presents: Party Pat's Bitchin Time Sauna! Party Pat: Ya'll, I gots canceled after one season of Lick My Taint. Only got three episodes of Twerk it Old School, yo! And those whack execs only gave me one single episode of Foot Rub Mondays, yo! But this is gonna be my cream da loo splooge, yo! Party Pat's Time Sauna!
On his left, Abraham Lincoln, wearing only a top hat and a blue towel wrapped around his waist, sits down and pours water onto the wooden box filled with hot coals in center of the room, making steam rise and expand.
On his right, a balding, three hundred pound, middle aged Asian man, with green skin and yellow eyes, sighs in relief.
Mister Amano: This is nice.
Abe: Right?! Hey, want to grab one of those milks after this?
Mister Amano gives a thumbs up and a creepy smile, licking his lips with a long, lizard tongue.
Amano: A Documentary on Bath Houses? I'd watch that!
Abe: Same (Nodding) It's such a rich history.
Amano: And honestly? One of mankind's creations I have nothing but respect about!
Abe: I agree. Like Ice Tea.
Amano: Or Cheese!
Abe: And let's not forget chocolate! (Finger Wagging)
Amano: (Clapping) You can never call Humanity stupid with a box of Buncha Crunch in hand!
Abe: Amen, my friend. Amen!
Party Pat: Yo, ya'll are missing the point here! (Shaking head) This ain't bout no butterfingers, or hundred grand bars, or milky ways. We talkin Saunas, yo! So, Amber-Lynn, thanks for being on my show, ya fine honey! (wink) Tell me bout yoself, girl, I'm all ears, nah whadda mean?!
Amber gives a perky smile "Well... like I said i'm 19 and i'm from Chicago Illinois! And I...um... I'm studying stuff in social media! When I graduate, I plan on getting a job on TV! Oh and I can totally touch the back of my head with my foot!" She demonstrates, stretching her well toned leg back, since she's wearing only a towel this leaves hardly anything to the imagination. "Ta-da!"
Post by chronoeclipse on May 28, 2019 22:47:48 GMT -6
(Sorry folks, there was a slight miscommunication between Kappa and I when we devised this idea and I went out for the evening so I didn't catch it in time to respond before votes came in. So unfortunately i'm going to have to go against popular demand on this one.)
Party Pat: If you were an old lady, would ya be a granny?
Amber scrunched her face in confusion at the question.
Amber: Uh... yeah sure? I mean, like, aren't most old ladies grannies?
(I wanna apologize, too. It's my bad! 🤗 Chrono and I joked about it... We definitely conditioned the vote construct on here! 😸 See options and of course that's the assumption! This started off randomly in a pm, Chrono had this idea <he really likes Party Pat, Btw 🤫> I moved it here, and I was really just giving Chrono some options towards direction and pace.)
Post by chronoeclipse on May 28, 2019 23:31:26 GMT -6
Amber had just assumed that Abe and Amano were dudes in costume. Like the guy dressed as an Eagle she had done that car commercial with. But Pat's question seemed a little weird.
Amber: Uh you mean like would I like being a Grandma? You said 'do' haha, like i'm only a teenager, I'm like not going to be a grandma for a looooong long time! But when I am one? Sure! I'd probably like it! You get to play with your grandkids and you can like chill and relax...
Abe: In my day, Being a living grandparent was rare.
Amano: And, unfortunately, those perks you were talking about, not always the case. Not every Grandma gets to relax. Statistically, it's pretty common these days for grandparents to be the legal guardians of their grandchildren.
Amano: (Nodding) For many reasons. One, sadly, being a rise in opioid addiction.
Abe: Opioid? Is that like Opium?
Amano: Eh. Kinda. It means Drugs. When people say it, they're referring to an additive drug dependency.
Party Pat: (Shaking his head at Amano) Yo, Who da fuck hurt chu, dawg!
Pat takes a minute to get his head on straight. That info Amano brought up definitely got through to him.
Party Pat: Okay, we gonna assume your kids ain't tweakers, are alive, and are parents. Thank you, Amano, for bringing up that ain't the case for all Grandmas.
Amano: You're welcome.
Party Pat: Yo, that was sarcasm and I hate chu and I regret inviting ya to this.
Amano and Abe laugh, Amber is amazed by Abe and Amano's dynamics and curious if Pat's frustration is genuine or a bit.
Party Pat: Anyways, ya see yoself the playful granny, the carefree, the fun grandmama? Sounds tight yo. Mind painting me a picture how ya see yoself at that age?
Post by chronoeclipse on May 29, 2019 0:05:38 GMT -6
Amber wraps her towel tighter and thinks. This was so weird that this guy invited her into a sauna with a camera crew to talk about her becoming a granny some day.
Amber: So I think i'd have like long grey hair... and my back would be all stooped and i'd be wrinkled for sure... ooo and like i'd be all veiny... you guys know how like some old women get all veiny?"
Abe: (Laughing) I'm sure you've seen photographs of my dear Mary... Father Time certainly did a number on her once slender porcelain legs!
Abe: (Nodding) Don't get me wrong, Mister Amano, I most certainly enjoys a woman with meat on her bones. And as for those blue varicose veins, well, I always saw them as a directions for my fingers.
Amano: (Nodding) I feel the same way with my wife. I'm sure you don't know the reference Abe, but my Yuri looks an awful lot like Yubaba from Spirited Away.
Party Pat: (Smiling) Really? Okay, now I'm glad I invited y'all!
Amano: Didn't you meet Yuri at my party, Pat?
Party Pat: (Shrugging his shoulders) Man, I was blitzed outta my mind, yo! I dunno!
Amano: (Laughing) Well, Yuri most certainly remembers you. You sure know how to make a five hundred year old Yokai feel young!
Party Pat: Damn, I really don't remember! (hand clap) Okay, Amber, back to you girl. Let's get more deets on your granny, yo. Like, do you have the energy to mall walk, go to bingo, slot tournaments in Atlantic City, and all that noise, yo. Or, are you wunna dose old biddies who practically sleeps twenty-fo seven, yo?
ark: Whooaaa that mattress scene
Jun 10, 2020 18:34:55 GMT -6
MeanMark: Right? I maintain the opinion that they should have showed some sort of process for the TF, but still a great scene nonetheless.
Jun 11, 2020 8:26:26 GMT -6
kappa: I feel like the point of that scene was a conversation towards her fears with monogamous long term relationship. The Aging was merely an extension personified, AND, in the backseat of what was really going on. A couple communicating.
Jun 11, 2020 9:13:11 GMT -6
kappa: However, I'd have enjoyed a gradual progression, still, I kinda get that execution
Jun 11, 2020 9:13:59 GMT -6
amoscrow: How do I post some WIPS on here? I wanna post some progress on something me and my GF are working on!
Jun 13, 2020 15:57:38 GMT -6
kappa: Not an expert, but, I think you just insert it on one of the square below the attachmentS
Jun 13, 2020 16:01:03 GMT -6
kappa: the group of boxes, the fourth one
Jun 13, 2020 16:01:34 GMT -6