You're pushing thirty, your metabolism is lowering, and your diet has become, well, not so good these days.
You carry the weight nicely, although, your wardrobe has changed styles as a result. You dress conservatively at work, you dress comfortably at home. Sweatpants and Pantsuits have most definitely dominated your dresser. You can't think of the last time your wore a top designed to draw attention to your torso. You most often wear clothing that does the opposite!
Shall we continue analyzing your 30s?
-Love life. Single or Long Term? - Living Arrangements. Still have roommates or on your own? - Hobbies. Improv or Spin Class?
You've got the income, you've got the partner, you've got a nice apartment, and a good babysitter lined up that your old roommates swear by.
Congrats, you convinced yourself that you're ready!
Are you though? Eh, I'm sure you are! Sorry for doubting that... it's just, you never really talked about kids till recently. Oi, did 33 really get your biological clock kicking into overdrive?!
Sorry, you do you, love! 😘
Again, congrats. Although... please, reconsider naming him Shelby. NO. For his sake. Just... just, NO.
All right, so 34 is pretty rough for you. And so is 35. Matthew is definitely a hands on parent, but that doesn't mean you're not knee high in diapers!
And the feedings? Boy, did your breasts get the full package!
Sorry, love, they resemble crispy pepperoni slices now. But hey, the stretched marked belly, the bumps on your fatty thighs, your spongy arms, your bum the size of a yoga ball, cellulite like cream cheese on a bagel, that's lovely. The Mum look is brilliant on you! Simply cracker!
Uh, let's dive into your late thirties, yeah?
- You're an obsessive PTA Mom -You're an intense workaholic -You've obsessed with losing the baby weight - Viewer's Pitch
kappa: Hope everyone who turned 21 yesterday enjoyed there first legal drink 😘
Mar 1, 2020 23:28:55 GMT -6
anonguy: I hope this pandemic ends soon and we can go on with our lives...I'm sick of being cooped up in my house. I want to see a movie!
Mar 22, 2020 17:27:18 GMT -6
kappa: Anonguy, to personally deal with this situation, I think about an old Chinese proverb about an Old Man Who Lost His Horse. PRETENTIOUS, I KNOW 😂 But, still, it's a valid lesson. Opportunity and Tragedy are two sides of the same coin. 😘
Mar 22, 2020 20:08:23 GMT -6
kappa: For example, you could watch Onward on Prime Video. Also, I believe other films are taking that leap.
Mar 22, 2020 20:09:07 GMT -6
kappa: not the same as the movie experience, I admit, but heck, I might just crumble a tray of brownies into a batch of popcorn! 🥰
Mar 22, 2020 20:09:57 GMT -6
anonguy: I don't have Prime. And I want to go out and stretch my legs.
Mar 22, 2020 20:12:26 GMT -6
kappa: Apparently, you could watch it on YouTube for $19.
Mar 22, 2020 20:15:23 GMT -6
kappa: And Google Play
Mar 22, 2020 20:16:09 GMT -6
kappa: Fun fact about The Life of Brian. The Love Interest in real life becomes mayor of a town in like Wales or something 😹
Apr 1, 2020 15:52:13 GMT -6
kappa: I swear to God, if The Brits give me one more positive surprise this week! Like something involving Helen Mirren... actually, yeah, she's definitely the Brit I'd love to see doing something special. ♥️
Apr 2, 2020 9:08:56 GMT -6
tej2506: Would there be any interest in a 4th session of the AP support group? I went AWOL after Session 1, and I miss doing group RPs. I really think it could bring us all together during these strange times, and it's the longest thread on the forum for a reason.
Apr 3, 2020 2:30:20 GMT -6
tej2506: Nevermind, forgot that Kappa's nerd talk is 45 pages long.
Apr 3, 2020 2:31:06 GMT -6
kappa: And counting 😘🤣
Apr 3, 2020 14:44:23 GMT -6
spyguy: I’m always down to revisit that game some time!
Apr 3, 2020 17:49:07 GMT -6
tej2506: Sounds good! I'll start it up in a few days.
Apr 4, 2020 11:38:23 GMT -6
tej2506: The Support Group is up now!
Apr 4, 2020 15:42:51 GMT -6
kappa: 2021 Better have a Golden Girls Remake. Just saying. It's needed 🤣
May 31, 2020 22:05:18 GMT -6
chronoeclipse: I know this site is largely an escape from the real world and it's goings-on. But with consideration for Blackout Tuesday, that's occurring across social media and the internet today i've chosen to pause my story and refrain from posting for the day.
Jun 2, 2020 9:11:32 GMT -6
chronoeclipse: A Day in a Lifetime will pick back up tomorrow. Be safe, be thoughtful, do what you can to support the people in your community that need it.
Jun 2, 2020 9:15:01 GMT -6