Aunt Rita's Dating Service
Jun 30, 2020 20:29:48 GMT -6
niddlyby43, chronoeclipse, and 4 more like this
Post by bob on Jun 30, 2020 20:29:48 GMT -6
It’s three o’clock in the morning, and you can’t sleep. You turn on the T.V. and flip channels until you stumble upon a surprisingly interesting infomercial.
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The camera focuses on a woman in her mid-fifties wearing large glasses. With a devilish but somehow also endearing smile she begins to speak. “Are you tired of being a loser at lover? Ready to find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Then Aunt Rita’s Dating Service is here for you.”
“My dating service is unlike any else on the market. Unlike our competition which focus strictly on compatibility, Aunt Rita’s Dating Service focuses on making sure you are ready to take that next step into a fully committed relationship with your partner. To that end, my program is not only a dating service but also a full life style brand. For only the small fee of $29.99 a month, you will receive specialized meals design to balance out chemicals in your body making you more open to meeting new people. But that’s not all, you will also receive my copyrighted relationship guidebook. I guarantee listening to it every night before you go to sleep with result in a brand new perspective on dating!”
“However don’t take my word for it. Listen to these testimonials from other woman who have reaped the benefits of Aunt Rita’s Dating Service.
The picture changes from Rita to a picture of a young twenty-something brunette.
“Hello my name is Shelly Carter. Before Rita’s Dating Service, I was what you might call very career oriented. I was super successful right out of college, but I struggled with finding love. That all changed as soon as I enrolled in the program. I soon found myself more tired around the office and started delegating tasks to younger people in the office. It just seemed like everyone around me suddenly had more energy and drive. Rita’s program also improved my taste in men. Before, I had always been drawn to up and coming lawyer associates and junior bank executives--guys still trying to make a name for themselves. Rita’s wonderful audiobook helped me discover that there is nothing more attractive than a man who has settled down.”
“It wasn’t long until I met Robert. He was a senior partner at law firm, but he had just decided to retire when I met him. I remember our first date like it was yesterday. He took me to one of the classiest restaurants in the city, and we just talked for hours. It wasn’t long before we spending every weekend together whether it be driving up state to see the leaves on the tree change colors or spending a quiet afternoon together in his backyard. He asked me to marry him within two months of our first date, and it was the happiest day of my life. I took early retirement, and Robert and I are now looking forward to spending our golden years together. “
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________________________________________________________________________
The camera focuses on a woman in her mid-fifties wearing large glasses. With a devilish but somehow also endearing smile she begins to speak. “Are you tired of being a loser at lover? Ready to find the person you want to spend the rest of your life with? Then Aunt Rita’s Dating Service is here for you.”
“My dating service is unlike any else on the market. Unlike our competition which focus strictly on compatibility, Aunt Rita’s Dating Service focuses on making sure you are ready to take that next step into a fully committed relationship with your partner. To that end, my program is not only a dating service but also a full life style brand. For only the small fee of $29.99 a month, you will receive specialized meals design to balance out chemicals in your body making you more open to meeting new people. But that’s not all, you will also receive my copyrighted relationship guidebook. I guarantee listening to it every night before you go to sleep with result in a brand new perspective on dating!”
“However don’t take my word for it. Listen to these testimonials from other woman who have reaped the benefits of Aunt Rita’s Dating Service.
The picture changes from Rita to a picture of a young twenty-something brunette.
“Hello my name is Shelly Carter. Before Rita’s Dating Service, I was what you might call very career oriented. I was super successful right out of college, but I struggled with finding love. That all changed as soon as I enrolled in the program. I soon found myself more tired around the office and started delegating tasks to younger people in the office. It just seemed like everyone around me suddenly had more energy and drive. Rita’s program also improved my taste in men. Before, I had always been drawn to up and coming lawyer associates and junior bank executives--guys still trying to make a name for themselves. Rita’s wonderful audiobook helped me discover that there is nothing more attractive than a man who has settled down.”
“It wasn’t long until I met Robert. He was a senior partner at law firm, but he had just decided to retire when I met him. I remember our first date like it was yesterday. He took me to one of the classiest restaurants in the city, and we just talked for hours. It wasn’t long before we spending every weekend together whether it be driving up state to see the leaves on the tree change colors or spending a quiet afternoon together in his backyard. He asked me to marry him within two months of our first date, and it was the happiest day of my life. I took early retirement, and Robert and I are now looking forward to spending our golden years together. “
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