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Post by MeanMark on Nov 14, 2017 11:58:34 GMT -6
Hey all, After an in-depth conversation with another board member, I thought I would open up the discussion here. If you have a significant other, do they know about your fetish? If no, why not? If so: - How did they find out / how did you tell them?
- Were they receptive to it? Do they indulge you?
- How does them knowing effect your relationship?
Personally, my wife found out (when she was still my girlfriend) because I used to have the Oldify app on my phone. She found aged faces of other girls we knew and began asking why it was there. Knowing that I could trust her, I was truthful and expressed my interests. She was very receptive to it! While she did not understand it (and probably never will) she was open to the fact that we all have our "thing." Not long after, she actually began to indulge me. She would, on occasion, send me selfies/faceshots of either herself or other girls we knew from school, work, etc., and tell me to "have fun." Needless to say, this is one of the reasons I married her! lol
While AP is not part of our "sex life" so to speak, she is still very understanding to this day and has never given me grief over what most would probably think of as "weird." Although, if we are watching a movie or TV and some sort of AP scene happens, she will usually flash me a look and ask, "Does that do anything for you?" lol
I am interested to see everyone else's experiences, especially those who may have not told anyone or (even more interesting) may have told someone that they are not in a relationship with.
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Post by youthdrain on Nov 14, 2017 21:25:12 GMT -6
Hey all, After an in-depth conversation with another board member, I thought I would open up the discussion here. If you have a significant other, do they know about your fetish? If no, why not? If so: - How did they find out / how did you tell them?
- Were they receptive to it? Do they indulge you?
- How does them knowing effect your relationship?
My wife doesn't know although she must suspect it to some degree. After all, I'm pretty good at Photoshop age progression and she's seen quite a bit of that work. I've even AP'd her 25-year-old sister to 50 for a birthday card. Every now and then, I'll make a comment as to how I imagine her aging and how I'll still think she's beautiful. So, of course, in answer to you question, after 11 years of knowing her, I have yet to tell her about "my interest" but I hope to some day. Anyone got any suggestions as to how? BTW MeanMark, you're a lucky guy to have such an understanding wife.
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Post by MeanMark on Nov 15, 2017 11:54:03 GMT -6
Hey all, After an in-depth conversation with another board member, I thought I would open up the discussion here. If you have a significant other, do they know about your fetish? If no, why not? If so: - How did they find out / how did you tell them?
- Were they receptive to it? Do they indulge you?
- How does them knowing effect your relationship?
My wife doesn't know although she must suspect it to some degree. After all, I'm pretty good at Photoshop age progression and she's seen quite a bit of that work. I've even AP'd her 25-year-old sister to 50 for a birthday card. Every now and then, I'll make a comment as to how I imagine her aging and how I'll still think she's beautiful. So, of course, in answer to you question, after 11 years of knowing her, I have yet to tell her about "my interest" but I hope to some day. Anyone got any suggestions as to how? BTW MeanMark, you're a lucky guy to have such an understanding wife. While I cannot speak to you and your wife's relationship, I will say that if you think she suspects it already then she probably knows more than you may think. Honesty is always the best policy, and as long as it is not impeding your relationship in any way, I would say it could not hurt to explain your interests. Like I said about my situation, my wife doesn't necessarily "understand it," but is not down on me about it either. I suppose it helps that we have been together since high school, so both of us have matured and developed into adulthood together which goes hand-in-hand with If I were you, I would start by trying to relate it to any other fetish and just explain that "this is not something you can exactly help having, but it is what it is and it won't change anything." Again, as I said before, I cannot speak to your relationship. But if this has never interfered in your relationship, and it doesn't in the future, I say it's worth a shot. You never know!
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Post by youthdrain on Nov 15, 2017 23:13:37 GMT -6
If I were you, I would start by trying to relate it to any other fetish and just explain that "this is not something you can exactly help having, but it is what it is and it won't change anything." Again, as I said before, I cannot speak to your relationship. But if this has never interfered in your relationship, and it doesn't in the future, I say it's worth a shot. You never know! Thanks for the advice. I'll try to work on it. It might take me awhile so bear with me. BTW, you said that the AP has never been part of your sex life. My question is, do you want it to be? And have you ever tried to inject some AP talk during sex? And whether or not you have tried, do you imagine her growing old while having sex? BTW, feel free to tell me that it's none of my business. I won't be offended. The curious part of me just had to ask and if I'm off base just tell me.
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Post by MeanMark on Nov 16, 2017 8:20:30 GMT -6
If I were you, I would start by trying to relate it to any other fetish and just explain that "this is not something you can exactly help having, but it is what it is and it won't change anything." Again, as I said before, I cannot speak to your relationship. But if this has never interfered in your relationship, and it doesn't in the future, I say it's worth a shot. You never know! Thanks for the advice. I'll try to work on it. It might take me awhile so bear with me. BTW, you said that the AP has never been part of your sex life. My question is, do you want it to be? And have you ever tried to inject some AP talk during sex? And whether or not you have tried, do you imagine her growing old while having sex? BTW, feel free to tell me that it's none of my business. I won't be offended. The curious part of me just had to ask and if I'm off base just tell me. I suppose I misspoke whenever I said it wasn't part of our sex life; I should have said it is not a "regular" part of our sex life. We have talked during sex about it, had some fun together with the Oldify app and, naturally, an imagination will go where it wants during the "deed." But this is only on occasion; we have a pretty normal and healthy sex life. We just spice it up on occasion.
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Post by chronoeclipse on Nov 16, 2017 11:56:14 GMT -6
So for me - i've been pretty up front with significant others about my interest in AP. I don't like come out with it on the first couple dates but usually at that stage in a relationship where you're sharing secrets with one another I will be open about my fantasies, though I try to kind of spin it or ease it in depending on the girl. I avoid being like "I write soft-core fetish stories involving sexy young women becoming shriveled old ladies!" I think even the most open-minded woman would be given pause at that. So what I typically do is lead in with my fascination with time-travel and the aging process. In my professional life I write about both subjects pretty regularly in a non-fetishy way. From there i've talked about the romantic sentiment of 'growing old together' and still finding my partner sexy when she's old and gray. That's usually pretty palatable. And like previous people have mentioned, it usually doesn't come as a huge surprise given the fact that i've talked about the concept of aging a bunch in the past.
I've had a few girlfriends who have been freaked out by this revelation, I think because of their own issues with their desire to stay young and attractive and their fear of someday growing old.
My partner now is generally cool with it - though also doesn't really get it and doesn't ask too many questions about it, I think because she's afraid of what the answers might be. She knows that I write stories about it and is pretty supportive of that and she'll share thoughts she thinks might interest me like for example last night she had a dream that she was suddenly being forced to retire (She's 27 in real life) and she was trying to convince everyone in the dream that she's too young to retire but like people our parents age were laughing it off and telling her "You're so much older than we are!"
I did have one girlfriend for a long time that go REALLY into AP stuff. She kind of had her own kinks and I think indulged mine heavily as a way to not feel as guilty when she pushed for me to indulge her. She would dirty talk to me on the phone as if she was aging - describing her body etc. One time she sprayed her hair grey before we had sex, which was a lot of fun.
She would also text me things to rev my engine. I save them all in a document when I got a new phone. These are some highlights. (She was age 19 - 21 when she sent these):
"I'll be old and grey by the time you get here... won't that be fun ;-) "
"This 65 year old wants to play with her hot young stud"
"I'm so old I don't know how to use a computer - plus my sagging tits get in the way of typing"
"I'm going to wear a thong every day of my life until I have to pull it up over my depends"
"I want you to fuck me when i'm 100"
It was a blast while it lasted. She was a terrible girlfriend in most other ways unfortunately.
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deptx
Elder Member
Posts: 153
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Post by deptx on Jan 7, 2018 4:22:15 GMT -6
I'm actually wrestling with this very concept right now. In the past I never shared my AP interest with any of my girlfriends...never dared to, even my now ex-fiance. Though I fantasized about all of them,& most especially my ex-fiance after the break-up lol I think one girl that I got very close to proposing to might have suspected, we were around 18-19 at the time & her mom(who was surprisingly pretty hot herself) didn't approve of our relationship & for reasons I don't know didn't like me at all. Her mom was divorced & I think in a way it made her bitter toward all guys. Anyway, after an evening of dealing with her unreasonable mom, I just said to my then gf, pretty much thinking aloud, "I wish she(her mom) was too old to interfere with us." Immediately my gf responded, "You wish my mom was what, super-old or something?" With a quizzical look & I told her yes, & I told her what I then imagined, that her mom would suddenly age into a little wrinkled old spinster, rocking away in her rocking chair & when she saw us together she'd be like "I remember being young & in love...don't waste it" or something to that effect. My gf had no love lost on her mom with her behavior, so she just laughed about it. Then she asked me if I had the power to magically do it, would I,to which I unequivocally replied yes, right that second. I think my enthusiasm at that surprised her, so I kinda downplayed it after that, but she may have also noticed me paying particular interest to movies & shows where women were aging, but I don't know if she connected the dots. She knew I enjoyed the queen's tf scene in Snow White, but I always told her it was because of the animation, how well it was done, & I think she believed that.
Where I am currently is that I am dating a woman that is older than me...for the first time actually. She's only around 34, so not really old but still older than me though she doesn't look it and has been mistaken for late '20's. It is in the beginning stages, but we do connect well & I really like her. It's just so different because I have always dated girls my age or a couple of years younger. The age difference doesn't bother me at all, I believe it doesn't her though she does playfully joke about it from time to time. But, I really, really feel a desire to be open with her about everything, which is unusual because I had learned from many bad relationships to be guarded. So I really would love to tell her about my AP interests..and that it isn't just about a woman getting wrinkled and gray, that I see the beauty in aging, which is very true, & I can see her still being beautiful the older she gets. I feel that since she has a good sense of humor about herself & is so empathic she would be understanding, but there is a part of me that worries because there is that age difference, & that revealing this to her might make her feel sensitive about it. I'm also worried that she might think I am dating her just because she is older than me, & that I am interested in the prospect of seeing her get older, & that is not true, I am dating her because of who she is regardless of age. So does anyone have suggestions on how I should approach this? Or just leave it alone? Lol
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Post by youthdrain on Jan 9, 2018 21:27:42 GMT -6
I'm actually wrestling with this very concept right now. In the past I never shared my AP interest with any of my girlfriends...never dared to, even my now ex-fiance. Though I fantasized about all of them,& most especially my ex-fiance after the break-up lol I think one girl that I got very close to proposing to might have suspected, we were around 18-19 at the time & her mom(who was surprisingly pretty hot herself) didn't approve of our relationship & for reasons I don't know didn't like me at all. Her mom was divorced & I think in a way it made her bitter toward all guys. Anyway, after an evening of dealing with her unreasonable mom, I just said to my then gf, pretty much thinking aloud, "I wish she(her mom) was too old to interfere with us." Immediately my gf responded, "You wish my mom was what, super-old or something?" With a quizzical look & I told her yes, & I told her what I then imagined, that her mom would suddenly age into a little wrinkled old spinster, rocking away in her rocking chair & when she saw us together she'd be like "I remember being young & in love...don't waste it" or something to that effect. My gf had no love lost on her mom with her behavior, so she just laughed about it. Then she asked me if I had the power to magically do it, would I,to which I unequivocally replied yes, right that second. I think my enthusiasm at that surprised her, so I kinda downplayed it after that, but she may have also noticed me paying particular interest to movies & shows where women were aging, but I don't know if she connected the dots. She knew I enjoyed the queen's tf scene in Snow White, but I always told her it was because of the animation, how well it was done, & I think she believed that. Where I am currently is that I am dating a woman that is older than me...for the first time actually. She's only around 34, so not really old but still older than me though she doesn't look it and has been mistaken for late '20's. It is in the beginning stages, but we do connect well & I really like her. It's just so different because I have always dated girls my age or a couple of years younger. The age difference doesn't bother me at all, I believe it doesn't her though she does playfully joke about it from time to time. But, I really, really feel a desire to be open with her about everything, which is unusual because I had learned from many bad relationships to be guarded. So I really would love to tell her about my AP interests..and that it isn't just about a woman getting wrinkled and gray, that I see the beauty in aging, which is very true, & I can see her still being beautiful the older she gets. I feel that since she has a good sense of humor about herself & is so empathic she would be understanding, but there is a part of me that worries because there is that age difference, & that revealing this to her might make her feel sensitive about it. I'm also worried that she might think I am dating her just because she is older than me, & that I am interested in the prospect of seeing her get older, & that is not true, I am dating her because of who she is regardless of age. So does anyone have suggestions on how I should approach this? Or just leave it alone? Lol Wow! That's a toughie. I think that if I was in your situation, I'd have the same reservations about opening up to her about my interest in AP. Hmm. I might wait and get to know her better… to get a better sense of her self-confidence? Not sure really. On the other hand, the sooner you get that out of the way, the better? I've known my better half for 10 years now and the longer I wait, the harder it is. And, she's 7 years younger than me. Either way, her being older than you, you kinda get a front row seat to her aging before you do**. That's pretty cool. **I'm pretty envious of Hugh Jackman for that same reason.
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Post by MeanMark on Jan 11, 2018 14:22:12 GMT -6
I'm actually wrestling with this very concept right now. In the past I never shared my AP interest with any of my girlfriends...never dared to, even my now ex-fiance. Though I fantasized about all of them,& most especially my ex-fiance after the break-up lol I think one girl that I got very close to proposing to might have suspected, we were around 18-19 at the time & her mom(who was surprisingly pretty hot herself) didn't approve of our relationship & for reasons I don't know didn't like me at all. Her mom was divorced & I think in a way it made her bitter toward all guys. Anyway, after an evening of dealing with her unreasonable mom, I just said to my then gf, pretty much thinking aloud, "I wish she(her mom) was too old to interfere with us." Immediately my gf responded, "You wish my mom was what, super-old or something?" With a quizzical look & I told her yes, & I told her what I then imagined, that her mom would suddenly age into a little wrinkled old spinster, rocking away in her rocking chair & when she saw us together she'd be like "I remember being young & in love...don't waste it" or something to that effect. My gf had no love lost on her mom with her behavior, so she just laughed about it. Then she asked me if I had the power to magically do it, would I,to which I unequivocally replied yes, right that second. I think my enthusiasm at that surprised her, so I kinda downplayed it after that, but she may have also noticed me paying particular interest to movies & shows where women were aging, but I don't know if she connected the dots. She knew I enjoyed the queen's tf scene in Snow White, but I always told her it was because of the animation, how well it was done, & I think she believed that. Where I am currently is that I am dating a woman that is older than me...for the first time actually. She's only around 34, so not really old but still older than me though she doesn't look it and has been mistaken for late '20's. It is in the beginning stages, but we do connect well & I really like her. It's just so different because I have always dated girls my age or a couple of years younger. The age difference doesn't bother me at all, I believe it doesn't her though she does playfully joke about it from time to time. But, I really, really feel a desire to be open with her about everything, which is unusual because I had learned from many bad relationships to be guarded. So I really would love to tell her about my AP interests..and that it isn't just about a woman getting wrinkled and gray, that I see the beauty in aging, which is very true, & I can see her still being beautiful the older she gets. I feel that since she has a good sense of humor about herself & is so empathic she would be understanding, but there is a part of me that worries because there is that age difference, & that revealing this to her might make her feel sensitive about it. I'm also worried that she might think I am dating her just because she is older than me, & that I am interested in the prospect of seeing her get older, & that is not true, I am dating her because of who she is regardless of age. So does anyone have suggestions on how I should approach this? Or just leave it alone? Lol Wow! That's a toughie. I think that if I was in your situation, I'd have the same reservations about opening up to her about my interest in AP. Hmm. I might wait and get to know her better… to get a better sense of her self-confidence? Not sure really. On the other hand, the sooner you get that out of the way, the better? I've known my better half for 10 years now and the longer I wait, the harder it is. And, she's 7 years younger than me. Either way, her being older than you, you kinda get a front row seat to her aging before you do**. That's pretty cool. **I'm pretty envious of Hugh Jackman for that same reason. I would be moreso on the side of waiting it out and seeing how things go. I cannot speak to your relationship, but I am sure most would agree that there's nothing worse than instilling a secret in a significant other for it to only be used against you later. Proceed with caution, but do what is best for you!
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deptx
Elder Member
Posts: 153
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Post by deptx on Jan 15, 2018 2:36:12 GMT -6
Youthdraim, Mark, I really appreciate your input guys. It has really helped me alot in my approach to that subject. The age subject actually ame up, & I assured her there was no issue with me, but if there was with her, we wouldn't take it any further. With that, she believed me & I am truthful about that, it doesn't bother me, so we are going tp keep going along with the current pace. I really like her alot & I don't want to push her away in any way, I do hope this relationship goes somewhere. So I'm taking the advice ypu guys gave me & I'm going to wait it out, bide my time & wait for when thag approproate time comes.
Though youthdrain you definitely have an awesome point about her aging before me...I admit that would be incredible to see!
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Post by youthdrain on Feb 5, 2018 22:32:06 GMT -6
So deptx, has she aged much since January 15th, when you last posted?
YD
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