Post by Kappa on May 1, 2022 14:29:49 GMT -6
πHey, I know what you're thinking...
π€Is that hottie in the yellow beanie giving you the signal?
www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/portrait-of-smiling-young-woman-wearing-yellow-cap-royalty-free-image/675020991?adppopup=true
π§π½βπ¦±... I-I honestly don't know!
Dave responds in a panic. Sweaty and shaky, an insecure kinda guy, he grimaces with worry. Sarah is totally his type. Wild, cute, adventurous. God, is he gonna blow this?! What if he's reading this situation all wrong?!
π§π½βπ¦±Is-Is she flirting with me or is she just fucking with me?!
πWell, if it's the latter, it ain't the kinda fucking you're hoping for!
π§π½βπ¦±...
π§π½βπ¦±I shouldn't make a move, huh? It's just too risky, isn't it?!
Dave shrugs his shoulders, his hands in his pockets, sulking as he gives in to his anxiety.
π€But what if it was a sure thing?
π§π½βπ¦±... What?
πWith InstaLaid, you'll be sent to a 100% guarantee of getting your pickle tickled by your person of interest!
π§π½βπ¦±... Really?
πOr your money back!
π§π½βπ¦±...
Dave looks at Sarah, his heart racing as she saunters off to her Modern Lit Class, her hips swaying an enticingly seductive motion, that gets his pants ridiculous tight.
π§π½βπ¦±π·Fuck it! Fuck it! Just take my money!
π€YOU WANT BE SORRY!
*POOF*
π§π½βπ¦±...
Dave finds himself standing in a small, dingy little room reeking of piss and ointment.
He looks at a bed railed with a rolling tray topped with pills in a sensible, functional, arthritis friendly green container, a pair of chained glasses, and a moist set of dentures.
Dave batts his eyes, looking left of the tray to see a wrinkled, old Senior winking at him with a shaky thumb up.
www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/smiling-senior-woman-gesturing-at-clinic-royalty-free-image/1356154797?adppopup=true
π§π½βπ¦±...
It takes his head quite some time to process what's happening. This ancient woman looks so strangely familiar!
π§π½βπ¦±...
But when she licks her thinned, wrinkled lips, it finally dawns on Dave...
π§π½βπ¦±... Sarah?
π΅π»Guess who just took their humira and is lookin' for a little fun before bingo?!
π§π½βπ¦±...
On the one hand, she's in her 80s, she lives in a nursing home, and is likely a stroke victim.
... On the other, it's a sure thing!
INSTALAID: Taking away the pressure with time!
π€Is that hottie in the yellow beanie giving you the signal?
www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/portrait-of-smiling-young-woman-wearing-yellow-cap-royalty-free-image/675020991?adppopup=true
π§π½βπ¦±... I-I honestly don't know!
Dave responds in a panic. Sweaty and shaky, an insecure kinda guy, he grimaces with worry. Sarah is totally his type. Wild, cute, adventurous. God, is he gonna blow this?! What if he's reading this situation all wrong?!
π§π½βπ¦±Is-Is she flirting with me or is she just fucking with me?!
πWell, if it's the latter, it ain't the kinda fucking you're hoping for!
π§π½βπ¦±...
π§π½βπ¦±I shouldn't make a move, huh? It's just too risky, isn't it?!
Dave shrugs his shoulders, his hands in his pockets, sulking as he gives in to his anxiety.
π€But what if it was a sure thing?
π§π½βπ¦±... What?
πWith InstaLaid, you'll be sent to a 100% guarantee of getting your pickle tickled by your person of interest!
π§π½βπ¦±... Really?
πOr your money back!
π§π½βπ¦±...
Dave looks at Sarah, his heart racing as she saunters off to her Modern Lit Class, her hips swaying an enticingly seductive motion, that gets his pants ridiculous tight.
π§π½βπ¦±π·Fuck it! Fuck it! Just take my money!
π€YOU WANT BE SORRY!
*POOF*
π§π½βπ¦±...
Dave finds himself standing in a small, dingy little room reeking of piss and ointment.
He looks at a bed railed with a rolling tray topped with pills in a sensible, functional, arthritis friendly green container, a pair of chained glasses, and a moist set of dentures.
Dave batts his eyes, looking left of the tray to see a wrinkled, old Senior winking at him with a shaky thumb up.
www.gettyimages.com/detail/photo/smiling-senior-woman-gesturing-at-clinic-royalty-free-image/1356154797?adppopup=true
π§π½βπ¦±...
It takes his head quite some time to process what's happening. This ancient woman looks so strangely familiar!
π§π½βπ¦±...
But when she licks her thinned, wrinkled lips, it finally dawns on Dave...
π§π½βπ¦±... Sarah?
π΅π»Guess who just took their humira and is lookin' for a little fun before bingo?!
π§π½βπ¦±...
On the one hand, she's in her 80s, she lives in a nursing home, and is likely a stroke victim.
... On the other, it's a sure thing!
INSTALAID: Taking away the pressure with time!